*Note: This is one of the many private responses I have received this week based on previous posts about sexual abuse. This writer did not give me express permission to share their post, and I hope they will forgive me for presuming that it was meant to be shared. I would never post, if it did not have such a strong message to a wider audience of readers. The comment was left anonymously, before I had included the option on the form to choose whether or not it was okay to share.
Thank you for speaking up. I pray that this takes a ripple effect and as some begin to speak, others begin to feel safe finding their truth also.
As much as I want to shout out that this happened to me too, I can’t yet. Well, it did happen to me, although it was not from anyone in “the church.” I repressed memories of abuse as a child. But, I am still physically, in my adult form, scared of the abuser even though I’m now getting help. This doesn’t mean I won’t eventually speak up publicly but for me it’s going to take some time.
So, I want to say to anyone reading this that it’s OK to be scared. But please don’t hide it. It’s big and scary, but please don’t let it rule you. Find help. Once you start, it’s so hard and not fun. But it becomes so much fun finding who you truly are when you’re free. For now, It’s OK to be scared. It is scary. But you can heal, you will heal, and you will find yourself again. I encourage anyone to find someone who feels safe and speak up. You don’t have to shout it out! Just take a baby step and speak to someone you feel is safe. And the first step may be in telling yourself that you are safe being you, being true, loving yourself.
And a word for any parents who have so many questions as to, “how do I keep my kids safe now?” Yes, we pray that God will keep our kids safe. But it does take effort on our part to teach them how to live through God’s love. All I can say as a parent is… talk to your kids (even at a young age) openly, meet them where they’re at, show your kids when you have done something wrong and openly express your secrets and sorrows to them, SHOW them how to live by you, yourself, living in TRUTH, teach them UNCONDITIONAL LOVE by living it. It’s a hard practice but you as parents will find freedom, love and happiness as you change your parenting.
And yes, this is not a civil war between those who want to speak, those who think it’s being judgmental, and those who keep secrets in “the church.” It’s just an invitation to those willing to open their heart to healing, loving themselves and in accepting God’s true love for them.
I also have to say that many people confuse “the church” and “one’s faith” whereas for me they are 2 different relationships. I will continue to pray for God’s love to shine on everyone—abused children, parents who find it hard to raise their children safely, abusers who suffer inside themselves, those who feel the need to “shush” the truth, and those who want so bad to heal and feel free…
May God bless you and shine his love onto you!
If you would like to share any experiences or thoughts publicly, you can leave a regular blog comment down below, or post on my Facebook link. If you would like to submit an anonymous story, you may do so at this link.
You might also like: